Tuesday, December 21, 2004

My 'T' Zone Resembles The Ozone

Lately my "T zone" has been flakier than Loretta Lynn's pie crust, and I don't know why. Maybe because I don't get all fagalicious about and/or spend an inordinate amount of money/time on a skin care "regime." To quote a scene from my favorite Janeane Garofolo movie, The Truth About Cats & Dogs:

Cosmetics Saleslady: We also have this new face cream which neutralizes the free radicals that attack the skin. Let me ask you: what's your skin regime?
Dr. Abby Barnes: My regime? The regime from which the radicals are trying to get free? Are we selling face cream or staging a coup?

The extent of my skin regime consists of lathering some liquid soap in my hands, washing my face with said soap, and rinsing. I use Phisoderm sometimes and then sometimes I use a Neutrogena face wash that smells REALLY good. That's about as good as it gets.

I'm wondering if maybe I need to bust out the tube of "Totally Juicy" peel-off masque that I bought because [A] I liked the smell (pink grapefruit!) and [B] It was on clearance, and actually put it to some use. It's pretty embarrassing to have dandruff face, esp. when you're wearing dark colors. You know it's bad when you walk into the public library and as soon as the little kids see you, they run excitedly to the windows, looking skyward, anticipating building their first snowman.

Anybody got any ideas that won't cost a fortune or require me to begin a skin care regime that will rival assembling an assault rifle under water? My face would be much obliged.


Blogger Mariana said...

Surely, if your skin is dry and flaky all you need to do is put some moisturizing cream on it(preferably for dry skin)? Just like you would put some cream on your hands if they were dry, or on your lips if they were chapped.

Oh and congratulations on the bloganiversary. Yours is my favorite blog and you know it! :)

Tuesday, December 21, 2004 2:58:00 AM  
Blogger JonCougar said...

Hmm say your a girl and write cosmopolatian asking them that Q. They love that kinda stuff.

Tuesday, December 21, 2004 3:15:00 AM  
Blogger Terri said...

Use the Neutogena face wash and get some Neutrogena or Ponds oil free moisturizer. Oil of Olay is great too, and it smells fantastic and lasts a long time, isn't greasy either. The moisurizers are pricey, but they last a long time, only use a tiny bit or your T Zone will look like the Pizza Hut Zone. I would definitely try the mask, too. And you know I wouldn't steer you wrong! :)

Tuesday, December 21, 2004 8:54:00 AM  
Anonymous Anonymous said...

I'm the same way. I have very oily skin, so my wife bought some of that Nivea For Men. It's supposed to deep clean your face and stop it from getting oily. I think it just blocks your pores for a few hours, because whenever I use it my face feels dry for about three hours and then it becomes instantly greasy! It smells good, but for an oil blocker, I can not recommend it.

Tuesday, December 21, 2004 7:52:00 PM  
Blogger mlndink said...

KirkKirkKirkKirk! (in the vein of a hyperactive child who just consumed a substantial amount of sugar)
Congrats on your bloganiversary! I had to contribute to this because I am a product whore--I love Kiehls, Fresh, Origins, etc...I don't wear makeup but I love da skin maintenance products. I recommend for exfoliation Origins Charcoal mask called "Clear Improvement"--it's supposed to unplug your clogged pores and I use it or Out of Trouble, a salicylic clay mask bi-weekly. They make your skin look and feel great--corny proclamation I know, but it's true. If you have a blemish, these masks tend to reduce them--as long as you don't "pick". Aside from the masks, cleansing with neutrogena is cool--and old school--they've got the acne formula soap in the orange and white box and that works pretty well--too bad their soap disappears so fast. Finally, even if you've got oily skin--I've got oily/combo--you've always got to moisturize. MOI-STUH is essential--just find an oil-free type--I use Kiehls Abyssine cream--but I recommend finding one with at least SPF 15 cuz our ozone is depleted and you're getting old. So there. Lot's of love to you and Happy Festivus!

Friday, December 24, 2004 11:02:00 AM  
Blogger Kirkkitsch said...

See, I knew I needed to put SOMETHING on my face, but I wasn't sure what. I thought moisturizing cream was just something women used. I've seen it many a time, but never really knew what it did. Now you know why I asked my readers to educate me. Now I know! :) Thank you!

Thank you also for the blogiversary compliment! You're too sweet!

Actually, I e-mailed them and they told me that real girls don't have combination skin and that I should instead apply some honey-colored highlights and lose 85lbs. Damn you Sassy Magazine!

Norrin Radd-
That's totally the same thing that happens when I use the Phisoderm! I thought it was just me! So, it's just blocking the pores, huh? Well, now it makes sense. I honestly couldn't figure out what was happening. My face is usually not very oily at all, but about 45 minutes after using the Phisoderm, you could use my cheeks and forehead to lube your car. Yeesh!

What would I dow without you? I mean besides having more candy to myself! ;)

I'll look for the Neutrogena and a good moisturizer cream. As I was telling Gatochy, I always assumed they were made just for women. To remove makeup et al. At least that's what my mom does. So is "cold cream" the same thing? I'm not really sure. God, I could SO lose my homo status if they ever find out I don't know all this stuff.

p.s. I died laughing when I read "Pizza Hut Zone." ROTFLMAO! OMG, I can so relate to that, since I've done a few experiments already. "No, I am not a guru, I have a pimple."

Come here sweetie, Uncle Kirk wants to give you something... POW! (in the vein of an impatient 30-something bipolar homo) Lol!

Ooh, the Origins Charcoal Mask sounds coo! I like unclogged pores!

Thanks for the blogiversary compliment, by the way. You a good kid! ;)

p.s. I am not getting old. I'm "maturing"... whatever. lol! ;)

Saturday, December 25, 2004 10:43:00 AM  

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