The Merits of Being Seen and Not Heard

Get a load of this guy. Survey says? Lunchable! I'm sorry. That was supa qweuh (say it like Vinnie Barbarino). I had to get it out of my system. I stumbled across this guy's self-made shrine site and stuck around long enough to download some peics.

He promotes himself as a Fitness/Promotional Model, Personality and Actor (natch), but I have a feeling he really wants "to direct." Amazing how the people with so little depth have the nerve to consider using the word "personality" when describing themselves. I'd wager to say it was more charisma than personality. There's a big difference. So get your hip boots, but watch out! He may draw you into his "sphere." ROTFLMAO! What-ever! Maybe ya'll can split a "Gourmet Frozen Dessert" while you're in said sphere.

Here's the misc. insight he offered about himself on his site: (words in parenthesis are my personal 2¢)

• Best Kept Secret: The original bad boy with a Big Heart... and a lot of Muscle! (Every guy like this thinks they're the "original" bad boy)
• Aspire: To be More (Vapid?)
• Accolades: Business Entrepreneur, Model, Actor, Entertainer (These types always major in Business)
• Role Models: James Dean (natch)/Roger Stauback/Kiss/The Hulk/Spiderman (What is it with muscleheads and superheroes?)

Personality: JD (Is that short for 'Jaded Dingleberry?') is a self-determined, goal-oriented go-getter. Once he sets his mind - watch out (But can he set his watch? That's the real test)! His goals are set and he follows through. JD is reliable, adventurous, fun-loving, genuine, what you see is what you get!!!! His fearsome, strong willed demeanor draws you into his sphere. This is the Real Thing... (God, could I write anything funnier than that bullshit?)

Hobbies: Motorcycle riding (natch), skiing, swimming, entertaining, outdoors (Does drinking a bottled water on the beach really qualify as "entertaining?"), business, sports, family and friends. Golfing (WASP alert!), weight training, college football at Southern Connecticut State (College plug, already), baseball, river rafting (Very Xtreme Mountain Dew of him), mountain biking, maker of Gourmet Frozen Desserts ('Gourmet.' The babes dig that)…

Don't get me wrong, he's kinda dreamy, except he sorta has a case of what I call PrimatePuss, BUT, in his defense, he has mastered that faraway, distant look. Enjoy!

Bitchfest 2005 has officially begun.