Wal-Mart(yr)
I recently had to go to Wal-Mart to get my car's oil changed. Having just 2 cars in front of me in line, I foolishly thought I would be out in record time, in lieu of my usual 2 hours. Silly me. Not only was I surrounded by top-notch, knowledgeable employees, I also got to spend 3 glorious hours within the confines of this not-so-super store. *Read this disgusting new article.)
And for those of you who may live in more rural areas and have limited choices on where you spend your income, you have my sincere condolences. My parents live in a small town (pop. 16,968) and unfortunately Wal-Mart is one of the few choices they have. But then, that's what Wal-Mart's foundation was built on: Small towns with extremely-limited choices.
Lucky for you I had my digital camera with me so that I could document my visit. So come, live vicariously through me as we take a top-secret virtual tour of the shopping experience called Wal-Mart.
[2] Just ONE of the numerous roomy aisles. Simply wonderful.
[3] If you ever become disoriented and lose your grounding, just look for one of the many tell-tale signs that let you know you're at Wal-Mart: NASCAR wear.
[4] Bolts of fabric for all your bonnet-making needs.
[5] Only Wal-Mart could offer such a wide selection of redneck-inspired Father's Day cards.
[6] The one saving grace of the trip. This guy was one of the few things I could find to look at that didn't have stencils of apples, geese, ducks, kittens or the word "non-flammable" printed on it.
What a cutie-face! I just wanted to tackle him and give him kisses.
[7] Wal-Mart customers are at the forefront of the cutting edge of fashion, as this photo attests. Black socks accentuate any summer ensemble. Also look for a return of culottes, banana clips and houseshoes as a daytime look.
[8] Nice legs! Mmm beefy. ROWR!
[9] Sigh. Those juicy calves (I apologize for the grainy quality. I was pretty far away when I took this one. You can only get so close for so long before suspicion sets in). The only thing that helped me keep my mind off my surroundings, not to mention giving me something to do for the THREE hours I was stranded there.
And I wasn't the only one that had been left blowing in the wind for a ridiculous amount of time. I befriended various other disgruntled customers, or should I say former customers.
Wal-Mart: Always a pain the ass. Always.
P.s. As an added bonus, go here to download your very own copy of the font Wal-Mart People (available in both PC and Mac formats!). It's the next best thing to being there! No need to thank me. Just enjoy.
posted by Kirkkitsch @ 6:00 AM
6 Comments:
I have been to Wal-Mart twice in the past two months and even that is wayyyyyy too many. It's so depressing. The lighting sucks, the customers are whipped into an idiotic frenzy and the customer service is atrocious.
The only reason we went was because we were in Maui and it's the only place on the island to stock up on cheap food, water and sports equipment. And then we went the other day because the guys at Best Buy didn't have what we needed and they told us that Wal-Mart next door definitely would have it. Other than that, I refuse to step foot into Wal-Mart
There are 10 in my neck of the woods - some less than a mile from each other. If I go a little farther out from Hampton Roads there are 5 more. Wal-Mart and Food Lions dominate the shopping scene around here.. and they both suck.
Brandon-
You're preachin' to the choir, baby. I So can dig where you're coming from. For me, Wal-Mart is an absolute last resort.
LOUP-
Did you say Food Lion?! Aw, our Food Lion went out of business about 8-9 years ago. I actually liked the one we had here. It was the only place I could still buy Popeye cereal and Gee, Your Hair Smells Terrific! But I understand what you mean about the overkill factor. It's the same way here with Blockbuster Video (another evil empire) and Starbucks.
Terri-
Yes, Wal-Mart does make a lot of money. Unfortunately it's at the expense of people who live in rural areas who have no other choice. Why do you think Wal-Mart builds stores in these small, podunk towns? The other places could have competitive prices too if they were backed by 11.2 billion dollars and stores every 200 feet.
I'm all for saving money too, but I have a choice and I choose to NOT shop at Wal-Mart. It doesn't make me any less "budget-savvy" by doing so either. I simply prefer to shop somewhere that has equally good store brands, un-edited/censored DVDs/CDs and considerably less riffraff. I don't know what your Wal-Marts look like there, but ours perpetually have shitty service, "tired/put upon" employees, clutter-filled aisles and generate a constant stream of garbage. Every area where they build one here quickly turns into shit reality.
And that's why I stand behind my original comments. No apologies here, either. Lol. It's not personal, it's a preference.
lmgdao: "I just wanted to tackle him and give him kisses."
Action like that may actually have me shopping at Walmart again. :)
Suzanne
WordsRock-
But it's true! I thought he was so damn cute! The irony of it all is that the majority of people who just looked at the pictures, assumed I was including him in my negative spin to shopping at Wal-Mart! Au contraire, mon frere (ma soeur)! Though he may seem generic to some, he is totally my "type." I'd never cause a mutiny on his bounty. ROWR rowr!
If only there were *some* action, maybe I wouldn't have to live vicariously through my camera lens. Lol! Sad, ain't it? I'm too much of a voyeur. ;)
i can TOTTALY relate to you there! we only have one (thank the gods!)here but what it lacks in numbers it makes up for in unreliable,pooly maufactuted and just plain tasteless,crappily made merchendize! yes you can get cheap catfood and dog food there as well as cheap everythings! but in the long run u wind up paying more because your dog had to be taken to the vet becaue you fed him that cheap shit and got sick because the bag got wet from being left too long in the parking lot and developed a strange fungus that somehow got overlooked! it(wal-fart) defineatly was the inspiration for the saying:"you get what you pay for!"
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