The Surreal Life: Season 4

I have a new favorite reality show: The Surreal Life. I watched Season 1 & 2, but skipped Season 3 because [A] I didn't care for the cast and [B] Every time I went to tune in (they moved it from the WB to VH1 due to "creative" differences), it was never on, even though the TV Guide said otherwise. I finally gave up outta frustration.[ The New Housemates Include ]• Adrianne Curry (Winner of America's Next Top Model))
• Christopher Knight ("Peter" from The Brady Bunch)
• Jane Wiedlin (The Go-Go's guitarist)
• Da Brat (Rap "artist")
• Marcus Schenkenberg (Calvin Klein supermodel)
• "Chyna Doll" (Ex-WWF wrestling star)
• Verne Troyer ("Mini-Me" Austin Powers)

First off, I've always thought Christopher Knight ("Chris") was hot as an adult. Ever since I saw him on The Weakest Link 4 years ago. He looked friggin' HOT with the goatee. ROWR! Well, I gotta say he's still lookin' mighty fine, with or without the facial hair. And apparently he's gotten on some exercise regime now (Perhaps in time for the show's premiere? Mid-life crisis?) and is lookin' mighty buffalicious at age 47. Double ROWR!

And then there's Jane Wiedlin, who was always my favorite Go Go. I just think she's the cutest thing ever, not necessarily because of her short stature or as everyone loves to pigeonhole her as "pixie-ish." I just love her personality. She just has that certain something that I'm drawn to. And, as it turns out, she's into S&M. Interesting. She's just so cute. She needs a hug.

Anyway, the first episode was fun to watch and it set the groundwork for each "character." Here's my take on the crew...so far:

• Adrianne- The poor man's Elizabeth Hurley. Claims to love the Go Gos, yet whose face initially appeared to not register who Jane was until she said she was in the Go Gos. Her 15 minutes are up.
• Christopher- Hottie with a Daddy complex.
• Jane- Cutie with a side of fetishism. Nice. Fun.
• Chyna- Chewbacca with fashion sense. Attention whore. Drama queen.
• Marcus- Nice bod. Looks like a Pekinese with Lupus. Typical model. Utterly forgettable. Personality-free. So not interested. Second least favorite.
• Verne- Another Hank The Angry/Drunken Dwarf (Re: Howard Stern Show regular who died prematurely) waiting to happen. Personality is a big turnoff. Sad. Third least favorite.

Which brings me to: • Da Brat- AKA Da Who? This experience is too "wack" for her. She needs to lose the attitude and realize her ass ain't above being the "has-been" she tells Jane she is in a later episode. What fuckin' show does she think SHE'S on? I mean, if you wanna "keep it real," then let's go there. The whole premise of the show is that it brings together celebrities who've peaked at some point. This is not to say they won't go on to do other things, but she seriously needs a moment of clarity is she thinks she's not on the "has-been" list, too. Baby, your album went platinum in 1994. It's 11 years later, so I'd hold off on the stone throwin' until you have some new accomplishments to bring to the table. Just because you show up for the photo ops at various shows/ceremonies, doesn't mean you're not coasting on fumes from the past. You betta recognize! She's is funny though. I'll give her that. Number one least favorite.

Keep in mind this is the first episode, so I may end up changing my opinion on any/all these people before it's over with. Who knows. I guess I'll just have to keep tuning in to find out. In the meantime, let's just hope Chris feels compelled to go shirtless some more (which I have a feeling he will). In actuality, he seems very humble about his appearance, I'm just being a bitch.

New episodes of The Surreal Life air on VH1 on Sundays at 10AM and 8PM, with repeats throughout the following week. Click here for the current airing schedule.